Getting pregnant is supposed to be easy
We are all warned how easy it is to get pregnant and how careful we need to be. We spend so long trying not to get pregnant that when we want to conceive, it can come as quite a shock if it doesn’t happen instantly! When you do eventually start talking about it, the more you realise how common infertility is. Everyone has a story to tell. They’ve been there, struggling with fertility or they know someone who’s still trying to conceive.
There’s a lot of advice available about fertility and I followed it all. Time kept passing by and we started to investigate why. After sitting on various waiting lists for what seemed like an eternity, after the usual tests and drugs we still had no answers…so amidst discussions of IVF I wanted to try one last thing…
Is hypnotherapy the missing link in fertility?
I’d had the idea of hypnotherapy floating around for sometime and I’d already tried some seriously weird fertility tips so hypnotherapy for fertility wasn’t that much of a leap. Of course we tried the alcohol free zone, the super food diet and several decidedly less mainstream tips that I believe took us seriously close to our pregnancy goal. But the tipping point? That was Henry.
With hypnotherapy in mind and the relatively new phenomenon of home based internet, I found Sharron, a hypnotherapist just around the corner. The first session was not what I had expected. I was told to tap my face. Because that’s going to get me pregnant isn’t it?! But this was EFT. Emotional Freedom Therapy. I felt calmer. I was less bothered by the thousands of pregnant women & newborn babies that insisted on crossing my path – everywhere. Even the pregnancy infested market halls of Ikea became manageable again. You know what I mean, don’t you? When you want a baby and suddenly all you see is pregnancy & babies. Even men with beer bellies can momentarily convince your brain that they are carrying a baby bump.
Who is Henry?
During the second hypnotherapy session I met ‘Henry’. Sharron put me into a hypnotic trance and we began Parts Therapy. She asked if there was a part of my subconscious that was preventing me from getting pregnant. Naturally this struck me as strange. Feeling a wash of fear, wonderment & a small glimmer of hope I ignored my instinct to run and decided to go with the hypnotic flow. And somewhere my mind I felt a desire to say Yes. Why? Because YES was the answer. I could feel it.
The next question. “Will that part come forward and talk to us?” Again I felt fear, trepidation, hope, but when I felt that the answer was a tentative “NO” I was relieved! But Sharron continued. Sharron began her negotiations… Negotiations any seasoned police negotiator would be proud of. She told this ‘Part’ of my subconscious mind that I wanted a baby, that I wanted a baby more than anything and that infertility was more than I could bare. She descried the love within my marriage and how happy a successful conception & pregnancy would make us feel. Then this seasoned hypnotherapist asked again “Will this part come forward and help us?” Yes.
I’ve never jumped out of an aeroplane but I imagine it feels just like I did in that moment. Adrenaline, fear, excitement, no going back.
But then it got stranger. “Thank you Part, thank you for coming forward for us” said Sharron. “What is your name?” I could feel my hands tingling, my feet felt ready to run but somewhere in the depths of my mind was a word. Henry.
The hypnotic key to fertility
We talked with Henry. We asked Henry what he was doing? As the explanation came forward, it didn’t make a great deal of sense but it was clear that Henry was doing what he thought best and was trying to be helpful. Apparently he was trying to keep my blood clean…So Sharon thanked Henry. She told him what a great job he had been doing and then struck a deal. This deal that was my turning point. This deal was the key to my fertility. Sharron asked Henry is he could suspend his ‘helpful’ duties for nine months. She asked Henry to down tools, put his feet up and sit back for just nine months then when I had my baby, he could continue his helpful work. To my amazement Henry agreed and I felt a tangible shift.
Turning the tide on infertility
In the coming days that shift became more and more noticeable. I felt calm. Relaxed. Sure in the knowledge that I could become pregnant and that I would become pregnant. Of course there were occasional doubts, but I put them to one side and focused on my increasing feeling of contentment. Trying not to be too optimistic nor too pessimistic. It felt like I had discovered a secret. A secret that if the rest of the world knew, they certainly weren’t talking about it.
During my next hypnotherapy session, Sharron took me through my body, looking inside and describing how it felt, how it looked and assigning each part of my body with a colour. It was a fairly swift process until we got to my uterus. I described it as purple, healthy, warm. Sharron asked if it needed any adjustment, any improvement. I didn’t think so. But I had the strangest feeling. I felt was being watched. I didn’t want to say as much, because it seemed too unlikely. Because I might be wrong. But it was definitely there. I didn’t feel alone.
A couple of weeks later I realised that I could have said it. I should have said it. Because I was right. There was someone else. There was someone else in my uterus with me. Because almost straight after my session of Parts Therapy, after my meeting with Henry, I fell pregnant. I just hadn’t known it yet.
Parts Therapy was my key to fertility. Everything I had learnt along my journey had helped. Everything that my husband and I had done to prepare had helped. But many of these things had also been stressors. Waiting month after month to have your Fallopian tubes checked is stressful. Having sex that is timed, rather than spontaneous is stressful. Reading then rereading fertility books is stressful. Even giving up alcohol & caffeine is slightly stressful to begin with!
Fast forward this story to present day and I have a Son who will soon be celebrating his 9th birthday and another two children after him! I am an Oxford based Clinical Hypnotherapist who’s passion is fertility & childbirth. I use hypnotherapy & my knowledge of fertility to help couples on all fertility journeys – natural, assisted, IVF, ICSI…
And Henry? Of course I know that I don’t actually have a part of my subconscious called Henry. Henry is a metaphor for whatever was holding me back from pregnancy. Integrated Parts Therapy works with metaphors deep within the subconscious mind. These may take tangible shape, they may just be shapes or colours. Whatever form they take, they are always enlightening, helpful and seeking change. And the hypnotherapy? That helps realign the mind-body connection to support a more conducive environment for conception. A route to conception that is rapidly becoming less elusive and is no longer a very well kept secret.